These days my posts seem mostly to relate to whatever trouble I've landed myself into yet again. What is it this time (I hear you wearily ask). Well I'm saying one thing is so, and other people are saying I'm completely wrong. It seems we have a stand off with no-one willing to back down. Oh, we've talked about the issues; spent last year doing just that, but it's just polarised our positions.

Now, when this happens, and I may not be alone in this, self doubt comes knocking at the door. 'These people know more than you do; they're right, you're wrong, simple as that'. I retreat into myself, going over the ground, not trusting my instincts. I mentioned this to someone yesterday. 'Oh yes, I always think it must be me that's got it wrong'.

But if we leave it at that, we can sell ourselves short and damage whatever cause we're engaged in. How then do we deal with it?

Remember this. Always remember this: truthfulness is a primary element of character. If you've got it wrong, you need to know; so check it out. You must be honest and objective with yourself, and take courage: intellectual honesty and personal courage are basic hallmarks of character. You need the courage if you are right and also if you are found to be wrong.

I have around me, a group of people who will gently and tenderly tell me when I'm wrong. I prize such people above all else. They don't attempt to please me and say what I want to hear. No, if I'm wrong they will poke, probe, (actually not always tenderly, they can be rough, especially my wife) I don't mind them being rough, because I know they care. When Anita drew a nasty splinter of wood that got into my foot last week, she had to be a bit rough. My wife is my first line of defence, and my biggest critic. I thank God for her; heaven knows how many disasters she's saved me from.

Then I have my friends, and colleagues at work who are always faithful in telling me the truth. After that, there's a whole raft of mentors; talk about safety in numbers. Am I that insecure? It's not insecurity, but rather a realistic recognition of my frailties and weaknesses.

The point I'm labouring is this: if you have a disagreement, let in the light, gather people you know and trust, check it out. Oh, and prayer helps too. Remember the old maxim; Pray like it all depends on God, act like it all depends on you. Cromwell put it better; trust God and keep your powder dry.

Are you in a tricky situation right now? Get around the right people. People who will bring truth to bear, people who will encourage and inspire you, but are totally committed to bringing truth. Faithful are the wounds of a friend. I've done this. I've been encouraged and strengthened by submitting my views to robust scrutiny. So, sorry guys, I'm standing my ground on this one.

Have a happy Easter time.

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